Little Shop of Horrors

Never again. That's how I'll start this story, by saying, Never Again!

Last Monday, the kids and I were in the city to have another visit to Walmart. This time, birthday presents for Logan was on the to do list. As well as printer paper, Vitamin C, socks, chicken, and Tupperware. The kind of one-stop shopping that makes Walmart wonderful and terrible at the same time. We did our running around and then as I passed by the swimwuit and lingerie department, I thought, I really could use a new bra. A quick scan of the hangers told me that walmart is not the place to get a bra, even if I am cheap, so I opted out. Then, as I was driving away, I remembered that there is a La Senza outlet at Beacon Hill. Score! It's an outlet, so no scandalous pictures of half-naked women to emblazon my children's little minds, and just walls and walls of bras. Surely I could find something quickly and easily there.

I pushed my 3-person stroller into the store, laden with ALL three of my children. This bra shopping was going to be a work-out. A quick scan of the store told me that my size was way on the far side...unfortunately, they had a bit of a display of 'other things La Senza sells' that you had to walk through to get to the bras. And it was Valentines Day. (seriously, what was I thinking?) Other ladies were shopping, pulling out unmentionables and holding them up to themselves, all the while I kept hoping my kids wouldn't pay attention and wouldn't ask questions.

"Mom, what's that?!" "Uh, it's a slip. You know, to wear under your dress." "Oh, a slip! That lady's looking at a red slip." "Yes, I see that." (I wish you didn't!). Grab a bra and head to the change rooms, quick! Meanwhile, Max's little arms reach out and he starts 'dribbling' the cups of all the bras he can reach. "Max, don't do that!" I left the kids in the stroller, right outside the change room door and told them to watch their baby brother and don't move. Soon I hear, "Hey mom, how does your bra fit?" "Hey, mom, this lady is trying on a black slip!" "Hey mom..." And we're outta there! I grabbed the bra I tried on, paid as quickly as I could, and shuffled my kids out.

There used to be a time when I could take my kids with me to places like that, and they just didn't pay attention. That time has obviously passed. And I got the unreturnable $10 bra home, and it doesn't fit. I guess that's a $10 life lesson. Next time, get a babysitter.