Lucy

Today, my daughter turns 5. It's hard to describe my emotions on this simple and yet momentous occasion. 5 years ago, on this morning, I held her in my arms for the first time and everything changed. I didn't know her then. Her face was unfamiliar to me. She looked like a baby. An incredibly cute baby, and I was pretty proud of that - but I didn't really know her. I have spent every waking moment for the last five years with her in my presence. I chose the name Lucy, because I felt it was sweet and strong - two things I hoped she would be. She is my angel-face; my baby girl; my peanut butter princess; my pumpkin pie.
She is sweet, and caring, and timid, and girly. She says jeans are uncomfortable, but she could wear a dress and stockings all day, every day. She doesn't like getting her hair done, but she likes it when it is done. She is brilliant beyond anything I could imagine. She remembers everything. Her favorite things are babies, and kittens, and pink, and flowers, and princesses, and jewelry - and yet she's modest in her attitude and so pleasant. She doesn't have a selfish bone in her body.
She loves her dad intensely and I hope he remembers that and holds her heart carefully.
She became a big sister fairly young, and in my opinion (this is not a slight to my own big sister - who is awesome), she is the best big sister I've ever seen. She has loved Max since the moment she knew he was on his way. She plays with him tirelessly and is constantly coming up with 'how about' games for them to play. She calls him her best friend and they truly are. She will give up anything she has for him, if it will make him smile. Now she has a new baby brother, and she is constantly kissing him.
She is shy and nervous in new situations and always rubs her hands on the side of her head when she feels that way. I like those moments, because it helps me to feel like she still needs me. She gets excited for attention, but then balks when it is given to her.
She has a strong testimony of the gospel and a strong understanding of it. We listen to her prayers and are amazed at the things she says. She is always asking for blessings for other people - things like 'a good night sleep for mommy' or 'a baby for Auntie Kari' - and the blessing she usually asks for herself is usually to have the Holy Ghost. At a very young age, probably before she was even 2, we had a very short discussion about modesty, and how we don't wear clothes that are revealing. She has taken that to heart and is modest and beyond. She follows the prophet - no questions.
She is my best friend, and I can count on her for anything. She is always willing to help.
She's goofy and silly, and loves to be funny - so she tries pretty hard to make people laugh. She wants to be friends with everyone, and can't understand why others don't feel the same way. She also doesn't understand why everyone doesn't just choose the right. She is so obedient. Even when we do have to give her a consequence and send her to her room (which is very rare) she goes so willingly and is immediately remorseful. She is not proud and says sorry easily. I love that she's still young enough to not worry about what others think about her and doesn't worry about her looks. She is happy with who she is and doesn't even have the notion that anyone could ever be unhappy with who they are.
I really can't say everything that I feel for her, except that I love her. With everything I am, and everything I might do, 5 years ago today Lucy made me into the best thing I could ever hope to be...and that is a mother. And I pray every day to be the type of mother she deserves.