I've been reading the New Testament. I commented to Tyler yesterday that it seems like there are a lot of people that deal with being possessed of devils. It happens really frequently. I haven't heard of people dispelling demons and devils as much these days. Is it just less common? Or just less spoken of? Or less recognized? These have been my thoughts this week.
I've also been PMSing. I hate it. I hate that once a month something seems to take over my body and my mind and I have little or no control over it. There are a lot of times, when I get impatient or frustrated, I can sense it, and control it, or choose it. But it seems like when I'm PMSing, I have no recognition of my temper and frustration until after the damage is already done. And then I feel awful. I don't like that once a month my kids have to 'watch-out'. I felt the same way when we were first married and I was on the pill. Only 100x worse. It was truly dark and terrible, so we opted out of 'the pill' as an option. (In case you were THAT curious about my birth-control choices!) But once a month, this tiny demon seems to enter my body and it is a physical struggle to overpower him. Add to that the headaches, aching and bloating, plus the chocolate cravings (which this month seem to be monumental!) and it's pretty much the worst week ever. And the worst part is, I know it'll come back in just a few.
So my new challenge for me: Get control of it. I'm not big on taking pills. (Not that there is anything wrong with them) When I struggled with PPD, I opted out of medicine and tried to find natural ways to combat. Taking walks and being outside helped, somewhat, but truthfully, reading my scriptures and praying were the only things that made a difference. So PMS is the new battle. I'm tired of being possessed of the PMS-devil. I'm still reading my scriptures and praying...so I will redouble the efforts. I imagine actually keeping track of my cycle on a calendar would make a difference, so I know when to expect it coming. Maybe some time before to be aware and prepare would make a difference. Some extra prayers. Some reaching out (that's hard for me) and not putting too much in that week.
This is my challenge...and I imagine I will be dealing with for a number of years to come. But it has to get better. There has to be a way. I refuse to give up.
1 comment:
Oh sister, I could tell you thing or two about PMS and my relationship to it. Vile, vile demon.
I take "happy pills". It's what we call them around here because they literally make me better. I am actually nicer on them then off and not PMSing.
They are herbal and I get them from my acupuncturist. I used to take anti-depressants for 7 days before my period and they worked great but I felt medicated and I hate that feeling. It was worth it though not to be freaking out all the time. Like you I try not to medicate if there is another, less pharmaceutical option.
Honestly, if you suffer like I do, I don't think there is enough scripture or prayer on the planet to save you. At least there wasn't for me. I almost committed myself I thought I was going insane.
Let me know if you need another option. No one needs to suffer, especially the children. They are young and they don't understand and it's so unfair.
There are options. Just remember that. And they don't have to be drugs.
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